So it turns out there’s a name for the evil that lurks in my lungs, and it is asthmatic bronchitis, also known as “Here, have an inhaler even though you’re not officially asthmatic.”
Which means mmm, delicious albuterol! And also an eventual prop for my Osgood cosplay, because you gotta think positive.
In a few weeks I get to see the Immunologist which sounds scary but isn’t, because they also do allergy / asthma things and they’re gonna try to find out why I’m allergic to so many things and why every God Damn Time I start a fitness program I get horribly sick somehow. It’s like the Universe wants me to stay fat and stuck on the couch watching MST3K all day. Don’t get me wrong, I totally could, as long as they’re all Joel episodes. But this evil germ also kept me so laid up for 2 weeks that I ended up stuck to the couch binge-watching Hell’s Kitchen. And then I got tempted by the open casting call for MasterChef. And then I actually watched MasterChef and thought “wow, what a god-awful bougie trash fire of a show.” (I’ve been reading a lot of Holly Wood articles lately, and her vocab is infectious.) Suffice to say MasterChef can go fuck itself, especially Christina and her hipster bakery. Bitch sells “Cereal Milk” – milk with cereal powder in it for 5 bucks a bottle. THE HELL?
But for now I must leave you with this thing of absolute perfection from the glorious Kate Beaton. As someone who’s been the victim of gaslighting before, I absolutely agree with Alice’s response and will be using it in future if someone tries to pull that crap on me again.
If you want to see more of Kate’s work (and you do, you SO do, just trust me) it can be found right here: